Photo by Denys Nevozhai on Unsplash

I actually never really think much of external things. I never really think about being cool, being pretty, getting rich, having cool jobs, etc. And after all those years, I still find it a little bit surprising to discover that people actually look at those stuffs as something very important. …


Photo by Katrina Wright on Unsplash

Your heart knows best, but it tells you in a very subtle tone, sometimes, it whispers. It can be hard to listen to it when life is loud and people tell you lots of different stuffs. You get so drowned in what other people say and what other people think. Sometimes, you get lost and you don’t know where at the first place, you can find it again.

At different case, you may spend your whole life listening to others rather than to yourself that when you get a chance to truly listen to yourself, you become confused, not confident…


Rokok di tanganku sudah hampir habis. Betapa basi hidup di Jakarta dengan scene yang itu-itu saja? Barista manis itu datang menghampiriku, “mau pesan lagi?”. Aku menggeleng. Cih, sudah ku bilang hidup di Jakarta dengan scene yang itu-itu saja cukup basi. Ku tahan diriku sendiri dari meraih ponsel dan masuk ke Instagram. Dunia hias penuh gemerlap, jauh dari sunyi. Aku tak pernah mau menuduh orang-orang yang posting momen bahagia mereka itu berdusta. Jangan-jangan memang itu yang mereka punya? Likes dan comments-mu yang menjadi pelengkapnya. Ah, tentu saja pasti ada mereka yang kesepian. Yang ramai dan serunya bergantung dari klik yang kamu…


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It’s not society these days, it’s us. Perfection is embedded so close to our current nature that we think that failing is a disgrace. We leave so little room for it. We do not allow ourselves to go through the phase, in peace, and more forgiving. We think they’re not normal at all.

There are plenty of things that we can call as failure. Getting brokenhearted and abandoned? Partners’ cheating? Seen incapable at work? Losing communication with best friends? Forgetting parents’ birthday? You name it. It’s not about the definition, or the event of failing itself that haunts you, it’s…


Photo by Minh Pham on Unsplash

21-year old Erin was the same ambitious, relentless, knowledge-hungry Erin as the 27-year old Erin is. She never knew how to stop, how to pause, how to enjoy weekend. She checked work emails anytime she got the chance. A chance to work during weekend amused her, at least, she had anything to do during weekend. On several nights she had to work overtime, she would do it. She loved her jobs, she loved the industry, she loved the people. She loved every travel she needed to take because of work.

I spent 2020 trying to rationalize why I started to…


Aku yakin sudah terlalu banyak artikel, postingan, atau pun konten di media sosial mana pun yang bercerita tentang betapa sulit, campur aduk, melelahkan, di luar ekspektasi dan betapa fenomenalnya 2020. Tahun 2020 terasa seperti mantan kekasih yang tidak ingin kamu sebut namanya. Seperti patah hati yang intens namun kamu belajar banyak darinya. Tulisan ini sempat hendak menjadi caption media sosial, dilengkapi dengan foto liburan Winter 2018. Aku urung melakukannya dan melewati akhir tahun jauh dari orang-orang terdekat. Tidak di rumah, tidak bersama kekasih.

Banyak yang bilang juga, kalau kamu berkata 2020 itu gila tapi kamu bersyukur tentangnya, kamu ga kalah…


Are you inclined to hot sunny Summer or 7-degree Autumn? Do you drink your coffee or bite the carrot cake first? Are you wearing the same perfume everyday or switching it for every other day? Do you eat your veggies or have more meat? Do you listen to classics or brit rocks? Do you check your phone or get yourself to the bathroom first in the morning?

Do you work til late or sleep yourself to death during weekend? Are you a good employee or looking forward to leaving your job? Do you add sugar on your latte or add milk on your tea? Do you wash your hands after reaching home?

Do you look at me the way I look at you?

Jakarta, 2020 — can I say “what a year” already?


Setiap malam ku merangsek ke kasur dengan harapan besok aku bisa menjadi lebih baik

Ketidakpuasan hati berumah dalam siang-siang penuh cobaan, kegelisahan berawal dari malam-malam di antara kekalutan

Jika harimu pendek tapi bersahaja, apakah kamu akan bilang iya kemudian bahagia?

Jakarta, akhir Agustus dan polemiknya


Photo by Oswaldo Martinez on Unsplash

Sliding into 6 months returning to normal life, all I was expected was normal life. What is the definition of a normal life? For each person, what is considered as normal will be different. Having 60-hour/week job in high rise buildings, coffee and lunch in between, weekend filled with barre and brunch, meeting dear friends and having comfortable chats with loved ones. Having lots of Indonesian food that I rarely had last year also belong to the expectation of normal life.

Looking at what we are going through right now, my heart breaks, I believe everybody’s hearts also break. We…


Photo by Ryan Plomp on Unsplash

Menarik untukku kembali ke laptop, duduk di kasur kamar sendirian saat Minggu malam. Biasanya ada kamu di sebelahku, entah mainan handphone scrollingInstagram sambal mengomentari timeline yang isinya hanya lamaran, kawinan, dan terus begitu diulang sampai habis. Aku melirik ke arahmu yang menggerutu dan kamu tak lama menaruh handphone-mu, sisanya kita habiskan malam bercerita tentang kejadian hari kemarin yang lucu ataupun rencana hari esok yang biasanya akan berubah.

Aku tidak pernah suka hidup tanpamu. Bosan tentu saja kamu mendengarku bicara demikian. Setiap kita berpisah di bandara, stasiun, halte bus, atau dimana pun waktu kamu perlu pergi ke A dan aku perlu…

Erin Triyogo

I enjoy writing about life, love, and fiction, too.

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